A non-interview interview

I have kind of an interview but not really an interview with B&N Home office. It's not an interview because, at the moment, there isn't a position open that matches my "skill set" but an interview because if something does come up, what is said in this meeting will probably play as an interview or at least a first interview. So, it's important is what I'm saying. Nervous, very. Worried, a little but they wouldn't ask me to come in if they were not seriously considering me right? I wouldn't question before but then I read "Bitter is the New Black" by Jen Lancaster and she was more then qualified for the jobs she applied for and it took her 3 years to find a job. The only thing that I really have going for me is that I have worked for the company for seven years and knows the product and the customers well. I know that has to count for something but I don't know for how much. B&N is big on hiring within the company. You hear stories of how people have gone from a part-time reciever to the regional buyer. So I know it's possible to make the jump from retail to corporate. I must stay positive! I really do hope that something comes up between now and August and I don't have to transfer to another store because I am really burnt out on retail. But I'm trying to overthink things now. What happens, happens and it will be great because I will be in NYC!

It's so much bigger!

For those of you who know me, which I'm sure is all of you but whatever, I'm kind of a messy person. I do kind of live like a frat boy. In fact, when Kat and I lived together, we dubbed our old apartment the Frat House because we had a nice assortment of pizza boxes and empty beer bottles around the place. We even had a name, thanks to our friend Elizabeth, TIG House. I forget what it stands for now but I know it was clever. I really do miss that apartment but I digress. In my apartment I living in now, it doesn't take long for it to get dirty because well it isn't that big. It's really a Beth size apartment, so when Kat came home and stays the night it feels a little crowded. Not that I'm complaining because I love it when Kat is here! It's going to make me really sad when we are in different cities again. Anyway, since she has been staying on my futon, I lent her some blankets. I'm not sure how old these blankets are but Kat says that she had some of them when she went to college so about 10 years. I really love these blankets, they are the perfect cover to have just one for fall and spring, when there is just a chill in the air and perfect to stack to keep me warm in the winter, unfortunately some of them had started to well fall apart. Shed like crazy. I would find pieces of blanket all over the place and it was starting to get to me. I knew I had to do something when I was at work and I looked down and say I piece of red blanket on the floor. How I dragged all the way to work, I have no idea but something had to be done about it. That would mean cleaning. That would mean, fighting with my overflowing closet to get the vacuum out. That really didn't appeal to me but I couldn't stand to look at the sad pathetic blankets any longer! At first, I tried to ignore it. I just took a book in to my bedroom. I couldn't see it then it wasn't there, right? Well, I did have to leave my room eventually and it wasn't like the bits of remaining blanket was all that was on the floor. I had let the room get really out of hand and if I didn't do something now it will only make things harder later so I gave in and did it. It's truly amazing how much my living room looks when it's clean. I have so much room that I didn't even know. I can now comfortably lie on my floor without having to knock a shoe out of the way or shove papers to the side. It's like a new room! Why haven't I discovered this before? It's like a whole new revelation to me. If I can keep my room clean, then I can use it for more things, like exercise. yeah right! But I could! This could be a whole new thing for me. Frat Boy No More!

Am I really that crazy to move all the way to New York?

This is going to sound dumb but it's stressful to move. I haven't even really begun the whole moving process and I'm already the stressed-the-fuck-out! I mean, really, the only thing that I have done for my move to New York is ask for a transfer from my store to a store there. That's really it. Well, not true. I did email some people in New York and I got a response back today but that's it. Every time I think about it, it just makes me more anxious and I decide to do something else instead. I have three months but those three months are going to go fast. It's already May! And to be perfectly honest, I'm not sure I can do this. I have never done anything like this in my life. I have talked about it lot but actually do it, no. I guess, it really hasn't hit me that I'm really moving to New York City! That I am going be to so far from all my friends and family. Kat is going to be in Buffalo but even Buffalo isn't that close. What if people in New York don't like me? I kind of feel like that I'm finally hitting my stride here in Iowa City and finally made it with the in-crowd. You know big fish in the small pond. What am I going to do in New York when all of my friends are in Iowa City? What if I never get a job in the Home Office and just end up doing what I'm doing now but only there? That really isn't' that appealing. There is so much I have to do before I have to leave and it's just so daunting. But I can do it. I mean, people move to New York from all over the country, World, all the time so it can't be that hard right? I just to get over my fears and do it. I can and WILL Do this and come this Labor Day weekend I will be watching world class tennis at the Billie Jean King Tennis Center! Oh Yeah!

In other news, the new Madonna album, Hard Candy, is awesome! I downloaded in from Itunes and have had it on non-stop since then. It's just a fun, dance, party record. No preaching, no politics, no religion, just Madonna having a good time and isn't that the Madonna we all love the most? Yes, yes it is.